WHAT TO AVOID IN ORDER TO LOVE YOURSELF

♥ By Nayan Chourey

1. You have to be Perfect

Perfect body, life, IQ… All of it. Perfection doesn’t exist and when you think it does on social media, it is often masking crippling mental health issues.

You are never going to be perfect. But the good news is, you already are perfect, in your imperfection.

2. Meeting Society's Expectations

It is our human nature to always be hungry for more, even if you hit that unrealistic standard, you will always be unhappy because you want more.

Don’t compare yourself or your life to that unrealistic standard, it only leads to self-hate and depression

3. Controlling Everything

The only thing you can control are things within your control and your reactions. Understand that you can’t control other people, their choices, and their behavior just like you can’t control the weather.

Life isn’t about trying to control everything, it is about how you react to it. Instead of trying to control everything and everyone, do the best you can do and then put your hands up and say ” it is in the hands of the gods now” and leave it to work itself out. Everything works itself out eventually.

4. Always being Selfless

Society has taught us that self-care is selfish and god forbid, our greatest fear is being called selfish. In response, we work ourselves to death so everyone knows how good we are.

But there is a cost to being “Good” in the eyes of society and that cost is your happiness. Get over trying to be “Good” and take care of yourself. Self-care = Happiness.

5. Ignoring your emotions

Find a chair, grab a coffee and ask what is going on with you today. How are you feeling? Feel that feeling.

Learning to actually feel your feelings instead of brushing them under the rug is the best way forward.

6. Ignoring Negative Thoughts

 Ask them: Are they true? Are they helpful? Are they kind? Before you say anything negative, ask yourself, does this thought benefit me in any way? Does this thought make me better in some way? Or is it just rude, belittling, and cruel?

We are often most abusive towards ourselves mentally, which means one of the most important keys to happiness is to stop internal torture. The endless insults, belittling, the “you’re so this and you’re such a that”. Only use supportive and positive language in your head.

7. Unhealthy Diet

 What you put in your body affects your mental health. Not just biologically but if you eat something you consider bad,  you sit and shame yourself.

Don’t shame yourself, life is too short to shame yourself for eating food. Take off the restriction on eating, stop dieting and eat like a human. Eat foods you like and eat natural foods. Your body will thank you.

8. Hating your own Body

Your body is a beautiful and wonderful tool for adventure. Your body isn’t designed to just be aesthetic to please other people and society. It isn’t a fancy Vase. It is a tool so that you can do all the things you want to do in this life.

Climb, eat, travel, work, knit… Treat your body as if it was your child. With nothing but love and the understanding that it is perfect as it is.

9. Settling with an unhealthy Environment

 Clear out all those negative people on social media. All of those relatable memes about underachieving alcoholics.

What you put in your mind becomes your life, therefore it is only logical that you fill your mind with positive information, and you will have a positive life.

10. Comparisons

Looking for ways to learn to love yourself? Remember this tip.

There is no one on this planet like you, so you cannot fairly compare yourself to someone else. The only person you should compare yourself to is you.